


He's Truly Sorry

by icegirl99



Series: You Love Him [3]
Category: Ghost (Sweden Band)
Genre: Angst, M/M, Not Actually Unrequited Love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-15
Updated: 2019-10-15
Packaged: 2020-12-16 14:04:04
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,591
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21037421
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/icegirl99/pseuds/icegirl99
Summary: Papa asks Copia to accept his apology.





	He's Truly Sorry

**Author's Note:**

> I'm getting more invested in this series than I originally thought. More to come.

The grounds were quiet as Papa walked back to the church. Being much later than when he had first came out, most if not all of the remaining clergy members had turned in for the night. It was when he had nearly reached the doors back into the church that he noticed a single light on in one of the offices. 

He knew that window. It was directly down the hall from his. It was Copia's office. For a brief moment, Papa wondered why the office was lit up. But his heart sank as he realized it was probably his fault. The Cardinal was likely trying to finish the last of his work to turn in in the morning. 

Papa stopped and stared at the window. He felt an urge to go to that office. An apology was needed if he was to work on mending things with his Cardinal. 

The light went off then and Papa dropped his head, feeling the weight of his remorse. Copia was likely still upset and it might not be best if Papa approached him until morning when they both had rested. 

He didn't know why he did it, but something inside Papa told him he couldn't wait. He pulled open the doors to the church and hurried in the direction of their offices. 

"Copia!" Papa called out as he caught a glimpse of the Cardinal just before he turned the corner. 

~*~

Copia stopped in his tracks and tensed, feeling his anxiety again. Great, Papa has come back to yell at me some more, he thought. He'd failed to notice the softer tone in Papa's voice. 

He wanted to just keep going, to run to the comfort of his bed, but his body wouldn’t move. His heart was fluttering in his chest and he was starting to sweat. 

Papa called to him again. Copia took in a shaky breath and closing his eyes, he finally turned around. "Is there something I can help you with Papa?" Copia asked trying to keep his voice level. "It's rather late, I would like to go to bed if you don't mind."

Papa sighed and looked at him. There was something in the Pope's mismatched eyes that the Cardinal couldn't quite place. "Oh, I…" Papa trailed off, for once at a loss for words, before suddenly waving his hand dismissively, recovering quickly from whatever had stopped him from talking. "Cardinal," Papa started again, this time speaking with a more controlled tone. "I've come here to apologize for my words earlier today." Papa watched Copia's eyes widen slightly as he started wringing his hands together nervously. 

"That's nice of you Papa," Copia replied refusing to look Papa in the eyes. He stared at his hands instead. "Thank you, but I'd really like to go now." He couldn't stand there much longer. It was bad enough that they would have to go back to working with Papa in the morning. There were too many emotions going through his head right now. Tears started to sting at Copia's eyes. 

Papa looked away and shuffled backward slightly. He waved his hand out, indicating that he wasn't going to keep the Cardinal there against his will. "Go if you must Copia, but please know that if you do, I wish to continue with my apology in the morning as I have much to apologize for."

"Yes, Papa. Thank you again," Copia replied nervously. What was Papa doing? Copia asked himself. This was not the Papa Emeritus he knew. The man that he had worked with for the past few months was much too arrogant and egotistical to offer an apology to anyone, let alone him.

Papa nodded and Copia turned to head to his living quarters. He took one step and thought better of it. What if this was what he'd been waiting for? Surely there was no way Papa felt the same. No way in hell. But the Cardinal had to know. "Fuck," he muttered. Squeezing his eyes shut against the pounding of his heart and the growing sense of dread in the pit of his stomach, he turned back around. 

When Copia opened his eyes he saw that Papa hadn't moved and that he was looking at the floor. There was a half pained expression on Papa's face, something that Copia had never seen on his Pope's beautifully painted face before. His heart skipped a beat and he wondered if there was something wrong with Papa. “Papa?” Copia offered, quietly. 

Papa looked up at him and immediately that pained look was gone. Replaced with a soft smile. “Yes, Cardinal?” 

He must have imagined it. Copia shook his head slightly. “Nothing,” he replied quickly. He wanted to get out of there again. He felt a slight flush go to his face when Papa smiled at him. 

“Ok then,” Papa said. Copia turned again. “Listen, Copia,” Papa started again, not wanting him to leave. “I know you want to get out of here and whether that’s because you’re afraid of what I’m going to say or because you are truly too tired stick around, I’m not sure. But I’m going to ask you again Cardinal, to entertain me the idea of an apology for my actions as of late.” 

Copia faced Papa once more, however, he refused to look at him. He kept his gaze to the floor. “You don’t need to say you’re sorry, Papa,” the Cardinal finally answered. “You were correct in your anger with me. I should have been able to finish the translations in a quick and timely manner.” It was his fault for not trying to finish the work after completing the accounting documents. 

“I’m not talking about just today, Copia,” Papa said. “Although, I admit that I must also apologize for today as well. I’m wanting to offer my words as a way to express my regret for the way I’ve treated you these past few months that we’ve been working together. And maybe, you'll find it in your heart to forgive me, yes?"

Lucifer be damned, Papa actually sounded sincere. Copia was stunned. He looked up at Papa and he knew Papa could tell he was surprised.

"You look stunned, Cardinal," Papa laughed lightly. "Does that mean you accept my sincere apologies?"

Copia stood there with his mouth half-open. He wanted to accept them, he really did, but what Papa had said to him cut deep. Something he wasn't sure he was willing to forgive so quickly. He closed his mouth and looked away again. "No," Copia said, a little cold and Papa's face changed to that remorseful expression again. "You said some awful things, Papa. It's not something I can easily forget." Copia felt his chest tighten and a lump form in his throat. He silently cursed himself for wanting to cry in front of the Pope.

Papa took a step towards him. "I'm not asking you to forget about them, Copia," Papa's voice was soft. "I'm just asking you to give me the chance to set things right, in the hope that I can prevent myself from saying such hurtful things in the future."

"I don't think it's possible for you not to say these things anymore, Emeritus," Copia replied, surprisingly keeping a level tone.

"Are you willing to let me try?" Papa asked. "I enjoy working with you, Copia. I enjoy your company. You're a lovely man and a devoted member of this church. You don't deserve to be treated like I have treated you by anyone, not even me."

"Yet you did." Copia was crying now.

"And I deeply regret that," Papa sounded desperate. He didn't like to see his Cardinal cry. He wanted to take Copia’s face in his hands and kiss away those tears. He held off. "Copia…" he reached out and put a hand on the Cardinal's shoulder instead. "Believe me, I will try my best to never put you down again. Do you understand me?"

"You said try," Copia whispered holding back a sob. 

"That's all I can promise you, I'm sorry," Papa dropped his hand and looked away. "Is that enough for you Copia?" Papa looked hopeful.

Copia finally nodded. "It's the best I can hope from you, isn't it?" He wiped his tears away with his hand, smearing his eye paint.

"Unfortunately, at this point, yes," Papa said. "I wish I could promise that I'd never hurt you again Cardinal but my issues go deeper than that." 

Copia nodded again. His heart ached. "Can I be excused now Papa?" he asked. He wanted to go cry into his pillow. 

"Yes," Papa said, his voice laced with emotional pain. 

"Goodnight Papa," Copia said he turned and headed for the stairs. 

"Goodnight Copia," Papa replied. "See you in the morning." 

Copia didn't reply, only climbed the stairs to his living quarters. Once he was safely in his bed he let the tears flow. Crying because he was both relieved and torn apart on how to feel towards Papa. He wanted the Pope so badly that it hurt him to think about it. He wondered if Papa felt something similar. The way Papa looked at him with such remorse, it made his heart flutter. He wanted to hug Papa and tell him that he would forgive him, but still a lingering fear for what might happen if Papa couldn't keep control of his temper kept Copia from truly acting on his feelings. 

Sighing the Cardinal turned over and took a deep breath. Tomorrow was going to be a rough day.


End file.
